Have you ever tried to convince your kids – and yourself – that you are just as cool as they are? That you are “fly” and “down? (and that you even know words like “fly” and “down”)? That you can keep up with them?

I’ll admit that I fall into that trap with our girls, more often than not. I use their slang sometimes. I’m intrigued by the latest school gossip and remember the names of some of the main characters. I’ll even listen to their music in small doses, although I switch the minivan radio back to my Old School R&B station when I can get away with it. I WON’T wear their clothing styles, though – I’ll keep Forever 21 sacred for them alone. The girls don’t mind my attempts to be like them, unless I embarrass them in public (like the time I called our minivan the “swagger wagon” in front of their friends. I got a good talking-to about that one).

This morning I was out for a run when I crossed paths with the high school boys track team. Most of them were way ahead of me, but there were a few stragglers who were behind me and gaining fast. Did I move to the side and let them pass? Hell-to-the-no! I sped up to an all-out run and kept just in front of them for a block until I turned into our subdivision. And what did I get for that round of “anything you can do, I can do better”? A side stitch and a few seconds of blurry vision from sheer exhaustion. Honestly, I wasn’t trying to prove that I could beat those guys (ok, maybe a wee bit). I wanted to show that I wouldn’t be passed by. I wanted to keep up.

Where does that need to keep up with a younger generation come from? We’ve all seen those movies where parents and kids do a role-reversal, and “madcap hilarity ensues.” Maybe, somewhere in my subconscious, I want to relive those teen years and have a do-over. Do it right, this time. Be cool.

Well guess what? I did my teenage years already, the good, the bad, and the pimply. Having teenagers does not give me a do-over of my young life. But it does give me perspective on my life now. That need to “be cool” is something I still struggle with, but now I recognize it. I see the girls fall into that way of thinking sometimes, and I can relate and help them work through it. I don’t have to be the girls to understand them.

True confession – it felt good to stay in front of those boys on the track team this morning! Let’s just pretend that they didn’t slow way down to let me have my moment of victory.